Funny Dog Stories from Author Janis Lane

Dog Stories-I could tell you a FEW        

When I first married, I couldn’t cook, but I was determined to try. My husband owned a shepherd mix who hadn’t taken kindly to me as yet. Name of Fritz. I made corn bread from scratch. Don’t ask me what happened, but it was a soupy mess. I took it out to the back yard and buried it in one of the many holes left in the lawn by you know who.

 When newly-wed hubby came home, he was playing in the back yard with his dog and you know the rest. That dog dug up the mess and I swear took my hubby over to look at it. He squealed on me. I got even. I swore it was dog vomit. 

 My brother-in-law was noted for spinning yarns a mile long. He claimed his lab could climb a tree. He swore he wasn’t lying. We all enjoyed the joke laughing heartily until he whistled for his dog. It was one of those sprawling oak trees covered with Spanish moss. The lower limb wasn’t very far off the ground and that dog jumped on it and climbed from limb to limb until he was more than ten foot off the ground. Then he turned around and, I swear, laughed at us. Just because you are mostly a liar doesn’t mean you can’t occasionally tell the truth. Just that you’ll need to prove it.

We owned an alpha male Aussie shepherd who had energy to spare, but he was totally neurotic. He would go down to the pond and chase the ducks. When they flew away he would stare at his reflection in the water and bark until he was hoarse. He would never take a walk with us. He would go a short distance then bored, I guess, return to the house. The cat would go with us. Perhaps the Aussie disdained to join the group because of the cat or we walked too slow for him.  

When I was a teenager, my younger brother owned a pack of beagles. When I tried to sneak into the house after breaking curfew, they would give me a lot of love at the top of their voices. It certainly alerted the household to my presence. Good doggies. 

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